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Michael:
It's very hard for me to imagine falling in love without that visual
connection you describe so poignantly. I feel stupid asking this,
but do you think you can fall in love with someone without really
seeing her face?
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Joel:
That's hardly a stupid question. For the moment, I can't imagine
how. I know that the blind do get together romantically, with
the sighted and with the sightless. I even read stories of deaf-blind
couples who have never seen or heard each other, though that
sounds more to me like some kind of cellular binding than what
I think of as love. I'm not insensible to what's left for me
to perceive for inspiration aside from faces and eyes. I can
still hear a tender, intelligent voice, make out the contours
of a feminine figure and the drape of the
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clothes,
and appreciate the scent of a woman, to risk conjuring up the
image of a cantankerous, suicidal Al Pacino. But all these things,
together, comprise a kind of erotic abstraction, the idea of
love as a house in the rain with no address and no door.
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Michael:
You used to flirt a lot. In fact, I found it annoying sometimes trying
to carry on a conversation with you if you spotted an attractive woman
across the room. I imagine you still flirt sometimes--what's it like
now?
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Joel:
I don't remember flirting in public, ever. I've always been too
shy. I do recall your annoyance with me during intermission at a
Sam Shepard play. I was only gazing around the lobby with hopeful
longing, except that night blindness and proliferating retinal blind
spots must have made my scanning look blatantly, embarrassingly
intense. These days, I don't flirt, either. If I were regularly
in the company of someone nice and developed a slowly accumulating
attraction, and imagined it might be mutual, I would find a way
to show my interest. But presently, no such opportunity exists.
When I go alone to things, like literary events and live music,
I don't "see" anyone, so no contact is made. At parties, I'm congenial
with women, but can't get a useful impression quickly enough, and
wind up talking to men, where all we're both looking for is substantive
conversation.
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